Today we have a brief follow-up on this series’ previous deep dive into “Extrordinary Educators” — ed-tech platform i-Ready’s fake award for laundering corporate marketing through real teachers and principals. As you may recall, educators selected for this bogus “honor” are flown all-expenses-paid on a luxury junket to Boston, where they are marched in front of cameras to shoot “I love i-Ready” testimonials for use in publisher Curriculum Associates’ marketing.
Indeed, in a recent interview with Indian trade magazine medianews4u.com, Curriculum Associates Chief Marketing Officer Sabine Mullin said the quiet parts about “using” teachers out loud:
“For us, the most powerful storytelling we have seen is when we have educators actually help us tell our story… Using videos, using real features, using imagery of real teachers”
- Sabine Mullin, i-Ready Chief Marketing Officer
Well it’s that time of year again, with Curriculum Associates actively posting across social media to recruit their new class of affirmation-hungry ed-shills for the Extraordinary Educators “Class of 2027.” This inspired me to do two things:
1. Introducing: Exasperated Educators
According to Curriculum Associates’ website, since its first Extraordinary Educators class in 2020, just over 300 teachers and principals have been “celebrated” thusly. And while these hand-picked honorees have sung a pretty sycophantic marketing song, what about the other ~800,000 American K-8 math and ELA teachers forced to use i-Ready? You know, the ones who weren’t flown to Beantown for wining, dining, and Insta-Tok close-ups?
To celebrate all those unsung, principled teachers incarcerated in the i-Ready schoolhouse panopticon, Epostasy is proud to present its very own fake award: Exasperated Educators.
In this inaugural Exasperated Educator supercut video, we see but a few drops of the ocean of fury and resentment that teachers post across social media to protest the unproven, ineffective, and cognitively harmful screen-based sham that is i-Ready:
Extraordinary Educators is essentially the academic version of an “Exquisite Epicurean” cooking award bestowed by White Castle or ConAgra.
2. Apply to Extraordinary Educators
With submissions currently open, and Curriculum Associates still studiously ignoring my emails, I applied to become an Extraordinary Educator. CA doesn’t share who judges this farcical competition or what the scoring criteria are beyond “best in class use of i-Ready,” but we can at least scrutinize the application itself. As you’ll see below, it’s a pitifully thin SurveyMonkey form that bears no resemblance to a legitimate education award:
Seven (7) questions about teachers’ social media footprints
Four (4) questions about using i-Ready
One (1) publicity waiver
Zero (0) questions about personal teaching philosophy
Zero (0) questions about building human relationships with kids & families
Zero (0) professional references or recommendations
Zero (0) work samples or lessons
In terms of actual merit, Extraordinary Educators is essentially the academic version of an “Exquisite Epicurean” cooking award bestowed by White Castle or ConAgra.
Alas, my Extraordinary Educators application is certain to be rejected, despite all the heartfelt blood, sweat and tears I poured into it. I won’t win because I’m not an i-Ready educator; I’m just a nosey dad whose kid was victimized by a sophisticated ed-tech scam.
Of course, there’s nothing stopping YOU from self-nominating to become an Extraordinary Educator, too. Click here to submit your application by October 30th. If nothing else, it’s a lovely roundabout way to give some feedback to Curriculum Associates, who famously lock down commenting on their social media accounts. So toss your hat in the ring, and maybe we can meet up in Boston Common during the next cushy Extraordinary Educators junket. You’ll just need to smuggle me out some charcuterie and one of those bottomless dry martinis…
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Curriculum Associates did not respond to multiple requests for comment on its Extraordinary Educators program, including clarification of the program’s goals, how eligibility criteria are determined (including the rationale for prioritizing early-career principals and educators), and whether participants receive any financial compensation, honoraria, or other consideration for their contributions to the company’s blog, podcast, video, or other promotional content, beyond travel, meals, and lodging.
Previously:
i-Ready i-Reckoning: Unmasking Curriculum Associates' Ed-Tech Scam
The definitive critical exposé of Curriculum Associates — the shadowy firm that made e-learning platform i-Ready into mandatory misery for 14 million K-8 American students. Covering the i-Ready controversy: the teachers complaining it wastes valuable class time and...
About John Allen Wooden:
Howdy. I’m a tech-traitorous writer, satirist, creative director, and dad of an i-Ready victim based in Los Angeles. Having done hard time in big online media, late night TV, ad agencies, politics, and parenting, I created Epostasy as my little lab for gleefully dismembering all those self-important things. Check out my tech-skeptical kids book series, Screen Time Tales, along with other projects at johnallenwooden.com
